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The Truth
By Vazridth Rendahl
Greetings to you. Allow me to introduce myself. My full name is Vazridth Rendahl. I am a servant to Luukos, future husband to she of the blood known as Bablistia, and father to Shilan Rendahl. This information apparently is already known to most of you who read this pathetic excuse for news. I myself rarely waste my time with the constant drivel within these pages, but when I heard there was a farce printed about me, I chose to read. I must say I was not surprised in the least that the Times would chose to print such lies...such blatant lies for the simple reason of trying to get more readers. I knew they were struggling, but I had no idea how badly. Until I read "Into The Breach". A fantasy written by she known as Chutnee. I myself knew Chutnee was lost in her own little fantasy world. I did not, however, think her capable of such lies about her son and the events leading to his birth. Especially at the cost of my blemish free reputation.
Instead of taking my anger out on Chutnee for her foolishness, I instead chose to invite you to read the truth of those events. Not that I find any of you worthy of such truth, but my son may one day find these filthy pages, most likely in a trash barrel used for rolton droppings scuffed into town. He deserves to know the truth. And so begins my story.
I suppose it all starts with the lovely Iscikella. I am sure she needs no introduction to most of you. She is the High Priestess of Lumnis. After she was blessed by a simple touch of my Master's essence, thanks to Lord Armaxis, she let everyone know that she indeed knew nothing of balance or how to keep it even within herself. I chose to take it upon myself to help her find true balance. True balance within herself. To balance the light of Lumnis, with the dark of Luukos. She was unwilling to accept it. Unwilling to accept a balance of both light and dark within herself. Unable to grasp the concept of balance. Her concept of balance is all light and nothing more. It sickens me to this day that she actually has people who believe in her "balance". I remained true to my cause, and never gave up on teaching her how to keep the balance and learn to love what it truly is.
Along the way I began to grow fond of Iscikella. Even though I thought her a fool for her lack of the balance she preached. At first I kept it hidden, but eventually I spoke of my feelings for her. She of course would not have it. She would brush my feelings aside every time I spoke of them. I certainly would have made a better companion than her husband. He even chose to kill me on more than one occasion because of these feelings I had for his wife. Killing a man because of the way he feels. How heroic.
And here in the story is where her wicked daughter Chutnee comes in. She being of Ivas and all, she enjoys the physical pleasures of men. She enjoys toying with them to get what she wants. When she became aware of my situation with her mother, I became her new plaything. As most of you men know, Chutnee is certainly not unattractive. She is a quite suitable servant of Ivas. I admit being extremely attracted to her and her ways. She has the ability to grab the attention of any man in eye's view.
To this day I do not know if it was anything personal against her mother, but she did not hesitate to take me away from her mother's company. She would constantly invite me to her bungalow that always seemed prepared for my arrival. There she would seduce me in ways that are not suitable to write here. She would constantly remind me that her flesh and blood was that of Iscikella, the one I wished to be with more than anything at the time. She knew. She knew just how to sucker me in.
I, Vazridth Rendahl, admit to making a human mistake. I let my lust and my feelings for her mother get the best of me. I gave into her seductions (not that it took much mind you). It was the closest to Iscikella I could get. Naturally Iscikella was not the only thing on my mind during these times because, as I have said, Chutnee herself is quite beautiful. Beautiful in a way that could keep a man up at night.
I felt wonderful afterwards. Taking my walks around the city. Thinking about that night. But I also felt guilt. Guilt that I had cheapened the one thing I truly wanted. And sad that I knew that my true wants would never be met. I avoided Chutnee for quite some time, which -- after a night such as that -- is no easy task. Until, that is, I learned the secret. Chutnee, in our careless act of lust, had become pregnant.
I had a wonderful childhood with my parents, and when they passed away I always dreamed of having a child of my own. Naturally I approached her about it with much joy. She on the other hand did not share that joy with me. A curse is what she called it, but a short-lived one she would say. She explained to me that she being of Ivas knew many ways to "take care" of such a burden to her. The images she would paint in my mind of such savage ways made me sick. My head began to swim. There was no way I would allow this to take place. The child within her, although it was as much her child as my own, was a living child of my flesh and blood.
I grew angry, and I grow angry as I write this to you. How could a woman who is supposed to feel love for a child, especially her own, treat it as a cat treats a flea upon its back? This was my child she was speaking of in such ways. She told me she would see the unborn whelp die inside of her and the gruesome detail of how she would dispose of "it". "IT" she would call my child. To this day I still cannot believe a person such as herself exists.
That is when I decided to take matters into my own hands. I met a woman named Bablistia, a servant of Amasalen. I came to her for help in this matter and she in return helped me. She explained a way in which I could prevent Chutnee from ridding herself of my child. I wont get into detail, I will just say it was quite difficult. The best part being IT WORKED.
Try and try as Chutnee did, the child remained, and she hated me for it. She accused me of ruining her service to Ivas. That she could no longer perform certain acts because of the "whelp" inside of her. What a motherly attitude I told her. I explained to her that I understood she did not want the child, but I did. She didn't have to do anything for or with the child once it was born. She could hand him or her over to me and I would be more than happy to raise him or her. That was not good enough for poor burdened Chutnee. Eventually, however, we made an agreement. She would do no harm to the child and I would take custody of the child once it was born. I thought we had a deal. I couldn't have been more wrong.
Chutnee began to pretend to be caring for the child. She did make it known she did not and would not love him and wanted him out, but she put on an act that made it appear as though she was doing her best to see that she had a healthy birth. In private, she was starving herself. She was not drinking properly. She was a mess and it was done purposely. She was trying to make it look as if her body simply rejected the child. That it was not meant to be. I knew better.
I took it upon myself once more to take care of my child. I made sure Chutnee would eat. Even if she threw up what she got down, I made her eat more. My child would not suffer because of her cold heart. Some of her friends and family saw me as cruel. Can you believe that? Her wish was to destroy an innocent defenseless child within her so she could better serve Ivas with the men in town, and I wished to make sure he was born healthy. Yet they gave me their cold stares and glares. Unbelievable.
I admit to losing my temper on more than one occasion. Lord Nevrek and myself went to Chutnee and gave her an alternative. We told her that we would cut the child from her womb at the proper time, the earliest time that would still be healthy for my child. It would be done safely. Perhaps we were a bit hard in our words to her, but this was no game. This was my child we were talking about. It was no time to be polite to the one who wished him nothing more than a lifeless corpse washed away from her.
It was Armaxis that came to me. He told me that getting angry and throwing demands and losing my temper were not the way. That I was to remain calm at all costs. Making Chutnee more angry was not helping any. It would be best for the child if Chutnee remained calm and we didn't do anything to upset her more. I understood and later apologized to her for my words, but that I did it out of love for my child. From that moment on we came to a small understanding. I tried my best to make her as comfortable as possible. Helped her sleep. Helped her eat. It would seem as though the more I came to her and made her more and more aware that the living child within her was alot like she...not of pure sylvan blood, she began to relate to the child and form a twisted bond with him. It was then that she decided to take care of it herself with little help needed from that point. She had decided to accept him.
Or so I thought.
The festival of Oleani was upon us. I do not bother to be present at such occasions, but I had heard Chutnee was going to go. No matter, I thought to myself she could use the fresh air and socializing. I assumed she would take care of herself. It was only after this festival I learned of her drinking liqueur in large quantities. Riding some sort of bumpy jerky ride they had set up. Eating junk. I was more than enraged at hearing this. I had truly begun to think she cared. I am sorry to say I was dead wrong. I lost my temper again and caused Chutnee pain. A pain that hurt her in the way my child was being hurt by her neglect. I shouldn't have, but I lost control. My son is not a game.
A short time went by, a week or so, when Chutnee began to feel the effects of her poor care for the child. She was right, the child was rejecting her. He knew how she truly felt. Somehow he knew. Chutnee began to feel very sick. She began bleeding severely. She begged for help and her friend Odevalis arrived to provide such. I think we all knew at that point what needed to be done. Chutnee could no longer carry the child. It had to be done immediately for the sake of my child and for Chutnee. At that point I cared nothing for Chutnee's safety. I only cared for the safety of my child. The fact that Odevalis, another servant of Ivas, had stated she would kill the child awhile back didn't make me very comfortable, but I had no choice at this point. Armaxis and Kadesha heard word of the happenings and accompanied us to Chutnee's bungalow.
It was there that with a shaky hand and hatred for my child began the sloppy birth of my child. Odevalis treated Chutnee with great care but cared nothing for the safety of my child. After a bit of time, Odevalis quickly removed my son from Chutnee's womb through her belly and quickly handed the child to Kadesha. Kadesha cradled my son and cleaned him up while Odevalis tended to her friend Chutnee. Once my child was breathing on his own and clean, Kadesha handed him to me. I held him in my arms for the first time. It was so wonderful. There in my arms...so tiny...so fragile...so beautiful...MY son.
The last time I have ever loved anyone that strongly was my parents as a child before they passed on. I began to shed tears of pure joy. He smiled up at me, his toothless infant grin. Something wasn't right however. The child seemed to giggle on the outside, but inside he knew. He had fear in his eyes. He was sick. He was hurt...inside. Chutnee's neglect for the child all that time had hurt him on the inside more than Chutnee even realized or tried to do. It was obvious to myself and Armaxis that he was happy in my arms, but slowly dying. He would not live more than an hour's time.
Armaxis and my own eyes met. We did not need to talk to understand what each other meant. The child was going to die painfully. Its last breath would be taken in absolute pain. We decided to save the child the suffering caused by Chutnee. Caused by Chutnee's friends and family. Caused by her friends of the light. Of Lorminstra and Lumnis and Ronan. All of them wanted to see the child die. They had gotten their wish. Armaxis and I would not have it their way.
I handed my son to Armaxis. My beautiful son. I kissed him on the forehead with a tear in my eye. I said my silent goodbyes while others stood by not understanding what we were doing. It was then that Armaxis was forced to do the unthinkable. He had to end my child's suffering. Armaxis began to speak the words. The "last rights" so to speak. A blessing to my child. My child would have no more of the cruel light that twisted his insides. That tortured him so. My child would rest peacefully. It was then that the others realized what was happening. They tried to lash out at Armaxis so they might see the child of a Luukosian suffer, but Armaxis stopped them. He removed a ritual dagger from his cloak, and with one motion, ended my child's pain and suffering. The babe did not live long enough to know the cruelty that is the light.
It is true I attacked Armaxis. But at that point I had lost control of myself. I did not know what I was doing. My son was dead. Peacefully and properly, forever to live within the coils of Luukos as a pure soul. I was happy for him in that respect but regardless, I was enraged and he was the closest to me. It was nothing personal. He brushed it off and understood I was not myself and left the area to allow me to calm myself.
I thought it was over. I was wrong.
Those of the light. Kadesha. Odevalis, and even Chutnee of Ivas combined what strength they had left to keep me away from my lifeless son. To keep me from giving him proper burial. They forced me back, and with their twisted evil magicks brought him back from the grasp of the serpent Lord. He began to breath again as Odevalis worked her foul empathic magicks along with Kadesha working with her cruel intentions of Lorminstra. With every breath my son took he moaned with pain and suffering. Every twitch of his body would cause him to scream out in pain. He was being pulled from the peaceful afterlife, into the hands of the cursed light. Every inch of life that was forced back into his body brought more and more pain. He screamed out for me, but Armaxis was gone. There was nothing I could do. I had failed.
And it was done. My child, suffering in pain, was alive again. It was Kadesha who glared at me and stole him away from his rightful place with my Master. They wished to see him live a long life of brainwashing pain and torture. Kadesha took my son away to a place I still do not know. She took him away to live alone and suffer. Because of their misconceptions of my Lord, they took their hatred for Luukos out on my son and for that I will never forgive them.
That is my story. That is the truth. Believe it if you will, but it happened. I will find my son someday. I will save him from his pain. No one will get in my way again. You do not do that to a child, regardless of your beliefs. Regardless of how someone might feel about me or Luukos. I named him Shilan Rendahl after my father. You see that Kadesha? Iscikella? Odevalis? Chutnee? EVERYONE?? SHILAN RENDAHL!! A real breathing life. Not a tool for your sick twisted ways. Not a tool to get revenge on those of Luukos. I hope you are proud of yourselves.