Lady Galadriel and I met inside the Elanthian Times building, awaiting our guest for the evening. I wasn't too sure what to expect, as my only prior contact with Filifor was to set up the interview. He had specifically requested Galadriel's presence, along with some fine spirits. We hadn't been there long at all when a lively halfling bard ambled in.

Dressed primarily in worked leathers, it was obvious the Filifor carries his shop with him when he travels. After exchanging pleasantries, we headed into the Editors' Suite so that we could carry out the interview with a minimum of distraction. As we all got comfortable, I produced a few bottles of rum from a nearby cabinet, hoping to loosen us up a bit. I noticed that Filifor was a bit shy, though he did his best to appear relaxed. After we started talking, he calmed down quite a bit.

Sildus: "Could you give a little bit of background about yourself; where you grew up, what things were like for you? That sort of thing?"

Filifor: "I twas borned in a small shire. Hads lotsa brothers. Mets Miri [his ex-wife] when I was young an' learnin' me trade. We had a whirlwind romances... musta been no more'n.. lessee... 100 years?"

Sildus: "Seems a bit longer than a whirlwind."

Filifor: "Nae nae.. twas a rushed thing. Well, we up'n gots married. Had some youngsters.."

Galadriel: "Ahh. How many?"

Filifor: "10.. er 15 er so?"

Sildus: "Must keep things interesting."

Filifor: "Well, ye musts unnerstands, me trade keeps me travelin' a bits. Bouts that time, I started me trade an tooks me nephew on as apprentice. So's Mouse, well he gots to be more like'n me son than me own. I was sorry ta loses him. "

Sildus: "I met Mouse once. Does he still travel with you?"

Filifor: "Nae.. he took up with those pirates. He introduced me ta.. well.. her."

Sildus: "Which 'her' might that be?"

Filifor: "Now, mind ye.. Jeze may looks formidable.. buts she be sweet! She be Cap'ain a' tha Spitfire."

Sildus: "I suppose the captain of a pirate ship has to look formidable, though."

Filifor: "Absaluteally! Most of their work is done by reputation alone."

At this point, Filifor became a little uncomfortable, so we shifted gears and started up a new topic.

Galadriel: "How about ye travels? I'd love ta see more of da werld.."

Filifor: "I likes ta travel. That be fer sures."

Sildus: "You'd almost have to in your line of business, though."

Filifor: "I enjoys tha Isle.. and likes Pinefar as well. I likes Yuriqen lots too. Those elfs, they be verra nice. I gets down ta Icemule some toos. I nae been ta often ta RR, buts plan to visits there more often."

Filifor: "I visits Helga's whenere I be in tha Landin'.. but there be a problem withs that."

Sildus: "What kind of problem?"

Filifor: "Wells.. I goes ta tries ta works fer people, an' they thinks I be stealin' from 'em! They nae will hands me their gear!"

Sildus: "That's odd."

Filifor: "Takes a heap a persuadin' fer them ta lets me do work!"

Sildus: "I'd have thought that most of our residents would have heard of you by now."

Galadriel: "Me goodness.. Must be da drink in em. Messin with their thinkin"

Sildus: "You're fairly popular, as far as our regular merchants go."

Filifor: "Well.. this be tha thing.. Ever so oftens, I likes to go works fer folks who be verra young.. likes 2 or 3 or 8. It be somethin' thats important ta me.. Those folks, they be.. well kinda innocent."

Sildus: "They don't know of you, and have only heard stories about people trying to steal equipment and such."

Filifor: "Anyways.. ye does work fer old Lords and suches.. Well, ta thems, one merchant is jes' likes another."

Sildus: "The magic in their eyes just isn't there."

Filifor: "They nae really cares if it be me or any other one. Well, that be a generalization. Most. Some are diffarent. However, tha new arrivals here... I does some work for them. Gives them a special backpack or cloak. A person remembers that sort of thing. And then 10 years later, when they realize wha' happened, it becomes a verra special thing to them."

Galadriel: "Aye. I still carry me purse da prince gave me."

Filifor: "It becomes magical. It be kinda like investin' in tha future. Ye knows wha' I means?"

Sildus: "Exactly."

Sildus: "So, where did you learn your trade?"

Filifor: "I learnt it from a wise elfs."

Sildus: "You've obviously been working a fair amount of time to become so proficient at it."

Filifor: "Aye.. I be onna tha oldest of me trade now. Ye maya noticed I nae much do lists any longer. Well, I be experimentin' with ways ta works fer folks."

Filifor: "First offs.. one a tha things I be considerin' is a method a taking a customer, lookin' at them, decidin' wha' I wants ta make fer them, makin' it. Then, ifs they want tha thing I haves made, they can buy it. They not be oblidged tho."

Filifor: "Another thing I be doin' is jus' wanderin' around, findin' a room of folks, 3 or 4 or 5, workin' fer them, then callin' it a night. This eliminates tha awful, hours long lists tha folks get booted from an' causes alla problems."

Sildus: "The first way is very interesting, in that it allows you to decide what you want to do, and you might come up with something the customer has never thought of."

Filifor: "Another thing I be doin' is supportin' tha arts."

Sildus: "How so?"

Filifor: "I be offerin' me services as tha prizes fer bardic recitals."

Sildus: "That's very good incentive."

Filifor: "I be doin' 3 jobs fer tha folks as tha won tha last one."

At this point, I couldn't help but notice that Galadriel and Filifor were making eyes at each other, so I decided to keep the interview from lasting too long. Gods know, they looked like they were ready for a walk around town.

Sildus: "Do you get asked often for certain things that you won't do? Just to give the readers an idea of the type of things that you don't like to do?"

Filifor: "Aye, an' I be happy ye asks me tha' Sildus. I be one who says no alots. I be one a tha oldest alterers nows. I knows what should an' shouldnae be made."

Sildus: "I've heard stories of people asking for demon claws and dragon's teeth and such. I know those are no-nos."

Filifor: "Fer tha' reason, I haves started follerin' a topic over on tha BB regardin' alterin'. Folks post their questions, an' I answers them so they knows in advance why we can nae does stuff. Tis called tha Ultimate Alteration. I did nae start it, but when I sees it, I felt tha there was a need fer it."

Filifor: "Anyways, far as me past. I was a travelin'. I was journeying from tha city in tha trees one day. I happened apon a cave. I wandered in, bein' curious, ye knows. Well, there was tha' sorriest group 'a folks ye ever did see. They had nothin' ta calls pretty. So's I did some alterin' fer them."

Sildus: "That was kind of you."

Filifor: "Well, afters that, I go on me way. Get to Teras Isle. Was wantin' ta sees some 'a tha folk there an' tastes tha cognac at the Helms, ye knows. Well, suddenly I was confronted by tha fearfullest fiends ye ever did see! They was mad that I had given those poor souls somethin' ta lives fer! Well, I still nae knows what it twas, but's all I knows is everthin' went black!"

Sildus: "That's not good."

Filifor: "But just befores it did, I member seeing somethin' that was dark as a nightmare. It filled tha area, suckin' me and everythin' else into its darkness. I thinks much time passed. I member vaguely hearin' me name called and feelin' losts. Folks later tells me twas the Vvrael gots me. I only knows tha thing tha' pulled me from the oblivion was tha sound 'a Dabu's voice callin' me name."

Filifor: "Well, twas tha funniest thin'. When I finally came back, I was young agin. Me wife Miri took one look at me an' says I be too young fer her. I be tha age a our youngest!"

Sildus: "One way to do it, but definitely not worth the trouble. Gotta be a better way to turn back the clocks."

Filifor: "So we agreed, an' she went offs an since me brother looks a bits like me, she decided he twould makes her happy.

This lead us off into a bit of a tangent, where we discussed such things as the elf who drew his portrait, how his wife could handle her liquor, and then women drinking liquor in general. At was at this point that I figured it would be best to wrap things up.

Sildus: "Anything that I didn't ask but you feel like answering?"

Filifor: "Hmmm... Well, I be surprised ye wanted ta talks ta me. I thought folks be forgettin' bouts me since I nae do tha big lists anymores."

Sildus: "I hardly think that people forget merchants and alterers so fast."

Galadriel: "Nay anyone that met ye could ever ferget ye"

Sildus: "You're still around, and you still do work for people. That's what they remember."

Filifor: "Well, I do hopes that be true Sildus."

With no major questions left to ask of Filifor, I concluded the formal part of the interview. Galadriel had offered to make a scabbard for Filifor, which he readily accepted. The two of them parted my company en route to the Warriors' Guild. Galadriel later told me bits and pieces of what transpired after their departure, but their conversation was held in private, and there it stays.